On Aging in Shambhala

Aging series on the Shambhala Times website

2012-01-16T18:28:00.000-08:00

The international Shambhala Working Group on Aging has a series of articles appearing on the Shambhala Times website.

To see the article click here

Aging in Community

2011-09-14T08:07:00.000-07:00

The Halifax Working Group on Aging has begun placing an article in each issue of the Halifax Shambhala Centre newsletter (the Banner) to stimulate discussion about aging related issues. This article, from the Sept/Oct 2011 issue, explores some issues related to housing.

Aging in Community

Where will we live as we grow old? This question seems to arise more and more often these days. I hear it from friends who are sixty and older, and I hear it in my own mind. Where do we picture ourselves living over the next ten or twenty years?
One vision that seems quite common involves living where we have easy access to contact with family and friends. Some people describe this as “aging in community”.
It sounds great. You have family and friends available for social support and for more intensive help should you need it. But the question is how to achieve the goal of “aging in community”.

Over the past several years I’ve been collecting some possible answers to that question. Partly this has been part of my role as chair of the Shambhala Working Group on Aging, a part of the international Shambhala governance structure. Partly it has been related to my personal situation. I turn 70 in November. In the past two years I see increasing signs of my own physical and mental vulnerability. The idea that I may actually need some frequent support from people beyond my immediate family seems more and more believable.

So here are a few ideas I’ve come upon. They don’t make up a comprehensive survey of how we could live as we get old, there are many approaches and projects I haven’t included and don’t even know about. And I do have my own bias about which approaches are practical. Please keep that in mind as your read this article.
For the purposes of the article I have divided the approaches into two main categories: (1) physical community, with people living in close physical proximity, and (2) virtual community, with people linked together but not necessarily physically near one another.

Physical community: Often, when I hear people talk about aging in community it is in the context of intentionally creating some kind of physical community. That is, moving into a living situation that is physically very close to a number of other people. Here are few examples:

There are some lovely and inspiring projects that have been going on for many years, such as the Camp Hill movement(http://www.camphill.org/). These are almost utopian projects, set in rural settings, with a wonderfully humanistic philosophy of aging.

An interesting current trend is Co-housing. With careful planning, a community is brought together to live in close proximity to one another. There are some lovely co-housing projects for seniors such as the Silver Sage development in Boulder, Colorado (http://silversagevillage.com). Senior co-housing usually does not include the ‘levels of care’ concept used in retirement communities.

Retirement communities with multiple ‘levels of care’ are a popular approach in mainstream North America. You buy into the overall project and start with a nice apartment where you are totally independent. When you begin to need for assistance you can move into a different section of the community where supports are available. Some Shambhalians have looked into the possibility of gathering a group of friends and all buying into the same retirement community. (In a similar way, a group of friends could organize themselves to move into the same co-operative housing building).

There are many "Faith-based retirement communities” (http://www.bestguide-retirementcommunities.com/christianretirementcommunities.html) but very few of them are Buddhist.

However, recently the San Francisco Zen Center has been working on developing a large retirement community in Northern California. They partnered with Northern California Presbyterian Homes and Services, a big non-profit that already runs several large retirement communities. A marketing study has been completed. Their systematic business approach is an interesting model.

Could we, as Shambhala practitioners, create a physical community, a cohousing project, a retirement community? From what I have seen so far the obstacles are that, like any large-scale project, it requires a long and complex process of planning, and major financial investment.

Virtual community: Aging in Place / Aging at Home. Another approach that may less complex and costly is to create a ‘virtual community’ that supports people in their current living situations.

This kind of “Aging in Community” was explored by social workers in the 1980s. They were trying to figure out how to efficiently provide services to seniors living in urban areas. They realized that creating new community housing that would bring the seniors together in a close physical community was both expensive and not very popular with the seniors themselves. Most seniors wanted to stay where they were, even if the conditions were not perfect. The idea of then was to bring the social services to the seniors where they lived, rather than moving the seniors to the services.

The province of Ontario has invested heavily in an‘aging at home’ initiative (http://www.health.gov.on.ca/english/public/program/ltc/33_ontario_strategy.html) that includes home health care and home renovations.

The Village Movement: Recently the basic idea of ‘aging at home’ has been developed in an innovative way by seniors, many with significant financial assets, who want to stay in their own homes as they age, but recognize the need for increased support. Rather than waiting for government or social agencies to create supportive program, they did it themselves.

The innovative process they used was simply to join with other people in a similar situation and set up a group buying organization that would facilitate affordable and efficient access to any extra help you need so you can stay in your current home. These kinds of organizations are appearing in a number of places under the name of the Village Movement (http://www.vtvnetwork.org).

One of the original and most highly developed ‘villages’ is on Beacon Hill in downtown Boston. Their website (http://www.beaconhillvillage.org)provides a great introduction to this approach. It shows the wide range of services to which they provide access. These range from home health care to delivery of groceries to plumbers. One interesting feature is that there are membership categories for people of varying income.

So what is involved in creating a ‘village’? In brief, a group of people (it could be exclusively seniors, or not), form a buying group and negotiate priority access, and discount price, from professional services of various kinds that are relevant to helping the members stay in their homes as they age. In doing so a community is formed. It is interesting that a ‘village’ is not primarily set up to have its members help one another directly, but by participating in the organization the opportunities for mutual support are obviously enhanced.

Conclusion: This article is a ‘finger painting’, rather than a rigorous discussion of housing options. It is intended to stimulate discussion. As we all continue to explore our options for where and how to live as we grow older there are clearly a wide range of possibilities. As is evident, my own bias is that the “village” concept is one well worth considering in more depth.

--David Whitehorn
9August 2011, Halifax

Thanks to Tom Bell, Pam Denicola and Dr. Andrea Sherman for insightful comments that helped shape this article.

FROM THE HALIFAX AGING STEERING GROUP

2011-02-20T17:39:00.000-08:00

After a series of open meetings on aging at the Halifax Shambhala Centre, documented in several postings on this blog in 2010, an aging steering group was formed to guide further development of aging related projects. The steering group has been meeting monthly and has written the following update to be published in the newsletter of the Centre (The Banner) in March 2011. The Banner is available online through the Halifax Shambhala Centre website. The update summarizes the key issues identified so far in the process of working with aging and provides an example of how one Shambhala Centre is relating to the simple fact that a great many of its members are getting old.

CALLING ALL SENIOR SHAMBHALIANS (60 and older).

Remember the 1970’s, and some of us were first connecting with Shambhala. We were young and didn’t think much about being old and the coinciding sickness or disability. Perhaps we recited the reminders of “precious human birth” and “old age, sickness and death”, but our hair was not gray, and our bodies were capable of sitting nynthuns with the main hardship being resisting the urge to scratch an itch or swat a pesky fly.

Nearly forty years later, on a day-to-day basis we may not be aware of how much we have changed. But bump into an old friend whom we haven’t seen for 20 years, and with a shock, we say to ourselves, “wow, has she aged! Gee do I look that old too?” Or do you experience a jolt of incomprehension when you see a photo of yourself these days?

Those kinds of experiences have prompted some of us to feel our age and begin to look into how our aging relates to Shambhala path both as individuals and as a community.

In the spring of 2010 a series of open meetings were held at the Shambhala Centre to explore aging related issues. Through talking circles and small discussion groups, a list of ideas, concerns, questions and needs was generated. These were assembled into general categories as follows:

(1) HEALTH, age related diseases, chronic illness and pain, nutrition, exercise and active living, social isolation and accessibility to Shambhala Centre and health services;

(2) SUPPORT, seniors’ support group/online support network/healing meditation group, caregiver support, the Deleg system as a network for support, phone calls to people who are isolated, information sharing through workshops, support groups, programs; (

(3) LEGAL, wills, estate planning, power of attorney, advanced directives, organ donations, financial resources;

(4) HOUSING, options, group or shared housing, long term care facilities, homecare; (

(5) END OF LIFE CARE, hospice, palliative care, preparing for death and dying, funerals (planning, cost, sukavati ceremony, etc.);

(6) ELDER WISDOM, a formal rite of passage into the status of "elder", a Council of Elders, passing on to future generations, keeping active, and contributing to Shambhala and wider community.

To focus on priorities and begin taking action a steering group was formed that has been meeting monthly. The members (David Whitehorn, Tom Bell, Denault Blouin, Robert Halpern, David and Meera Flint, Myra Donnelly, Yeshe Fuchs and Pamela DeNicola) have identified four core projects/issues:

(1) Survey of needs and attitudes, (2) Seniors Support Network, (3) Programs for Shambhalians 60+, and (4) Council of Elders. The current thinking on each of these projects is as follows:

SURVEY OF NEEDS AND ATTITUDES:
To understand the needs and concerns of Shambhala seniors we need to conduct a survey. The steering group is compiling a list of seniors and contact information. This list will enable us access to distribute the survey to senior members as well as provide a basis for ongoing communication, including connecting with seniors in need. Our next step is to design the survey questions. We hope to be able to have the survey ready this spring. Updates will be posted in the Banner

SENIORS SUPPORT NETWORK:
We will begin to develop a support network by first relaying information through regular newsletters and Banner information and articles.

Survey data will help to focus the need for a support network and how best to design and implement. Some ideas that have already arisen are (1) online support group to share information and enlist support/help, (2) phone group (volunteers who call senior members as well as any member who is suffering from loss, disability, illness, etc.) to check in on those needing support, (3) support group that meets regularly (i.e. Seniors Anonymous), (4) Deleg support network (volunteers in each delek who provide support when needed).

PROGRAMS FOR SHAMBHALIANS 60+:
There are many issues that seniors may wish to explore through organized programs. Recently the Shambhala Centre hosted a weekend with Jacquie Bell and Shari Vogler on preparing for the end of life. The Thursday night Sadhaka class is currently discussing Ponlop Rinpoche’s book “Mind Beyond Death”. And in October Dorje Denma Ling has invited Andrew Holecek for a weekend program, “Dream Yoga and the Art of Dying”. These are wonderful examples of programs that are useful and relevant for everyone, and particularly seniors.

COUNCIL OF ELDERS:
From the Shambala Centre database we know that more than half the current members are 60 years of age or older. Reflecting on this, we can see how important it is for seniors to share our accumulated wisdom with the next generation as they take on more and more responsibility. By doing so, seniors can play an important role in the continuation and flourishing of our lineage and the Centre. As elders we can lend our experience as wisdom and compassion holders. To help with this process, the steering group is exploring the idea of a Council of Elders that could represent seniors within the governance structure of the Centre.

New York Zen Center Program Could Transform Healthcare for Elders

2011-02-11T08:18:00.000-08:00

The following article was written by Andrea Sherman, a member of the Shambhala Working Group on Aging.

“Our society has made demons out of illness and death. With tireless integrity and compassion, the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care prescribes the Buddha’s medicine: sanctity of life, vows of service and letting go.”—Roshi Bernie Glassman, Ph.D.

In September of this year, I became a student in the Foundations of Contemplative Care program offered through the New York Zen Center. My motivation came from my desire to integrate spirituality into the training and practice of my professional and personal work in creativity, aging and person-centered care.

For 10 weekends during the year, students with varying backgrounds such as nurses, social workers, priests, hospice workers, doctors, therapists, caregivers, and other professions participated in this Buddhist-centered inquiry into the practice of service to others. The interfaith, experience-based program is geared to professionals with a wide array of experiences in life, caregiving, Buddhism and other spiritual practices.

To complete the program, participants must complete 100 hours of volunteer caregiving, supervisions, readings, monthly reflection papers, verbatim, doing advanced directives, and a final project. Each month there is a focus on a Zen Buddhist precept. This training structure offers ethical guidelines that “frame” each month. The precepts are:
· Not killing.
· Not stealing.
· Not misusing sex.
· Not lying.
· Not giving or taking drugs.
· Not discussing faults of others.
· Not praising yourself while abusing others.
· Not sparing the dharma assets.
· Not indulging in anger.
· Not defaming the three treasures.

Participants consider the precepts from three perspectives: literal, relational, and intrinsic. Another way to translate this is to pose three questions for the precepts: Does the action of my physical body uphold this precept? Does my action free others from suffering, and, not being separate (intrinsic meaning of no separation)?

Contemplative care is an approach to spiritual care and can be helpful to those caring for older adults who are ill, suffering, and dying.

The following excerpts from an interview with Robert Chodo Campbell, Zen priest, co-founder and co-executive director of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care, illustrate some of the program’s key concepts.

Question: What is contemplative caregiving?

Campbell: One can only be as intimate with another person as they are with themselves, to find intimacy with one’s self there has to be a capacity for deep introspection and reflection, or we could call that contemplating. I think it’s really important to know who we are on a deep psychological and emotional level if we are professionals taking care of others. Out of a contemplative practice we learn to realize that there is separateness and there is no separation with the other. I think that’s what contemplative caring is, caring for the other, wholeheartedly, without getting lost in their journey. This is their journey, not mine and yet we are companions. In a way we are guiding each other.

Question: What is presence?

Campbell: Presence quite simply is being present to one’s self and other, with no separation, presence is being fully aware of what is occurring in one’s self in each moment. Presence is breath. Presence is inhale-exhale.
Putting the Foundations Program into Practice

In the first meeting of the Foundations in Contemplative Care program, participants learn about the Three Treasures:
· Not-knowing or formlessness.
· Bearing witness of the relationships unfolding within and without us.
· Loving action.

Not knowing is to give up fixed ideas about ourselves and the universe. Bearing witness is to see the joy and the suffering of the world, and the expression of loving actions to us and to others. This translates into practice as I learn to enter the room of the hospice resident, and to “greet the room” as I enter, not knowing, scanning myself before entering the room, and “reading the room energy” I enter, in, to be present. This is attunement, tuning in. The three wheels are:
· Myself.
· The person.
· The time and space of our connection.

Then, I bear witness to the person and to myself, practicing “being” with joy, and with suffering. Feeling the courage, remembering that “it’s not what you do, it’s who you are.” We practice active listening to the person, an older person who is ill with chronic disease, and perhaps listening to someone who is actively dying, contemplating the images that are presented to us. Loving action can be the spiritual presence and energetic space of prayer, allowing the person to be where they are, and opening to the “tender and awakened heart.”

A goal of the program is for us to become “awake” for all of those that we encounter as caregivers, and to respect the dignity of all human beings. Since the program’s inception, contemplative care has been provided to 14,977 hospice and hospital patients, 3,839 healthcare providers and staff, 2,469 workshop participants, 21 units at Beth Israel Medical Center, and 8 hospice suites at VNSNY Hospice.

Question: Do health professionals learn to practice presence?

Campbell: When you leave one patient, before going to the next, take a deep breath. This simple ritual symbolizes being present to what you are fully in this moment—not taking the last patient into the room of the next patient. So where is your breath, where is your mind?

The important thing for any caregiver, particularly for those who care for a dying person is to be fully conscious of the fact that we are dying too. To think differently denies one’s truth. When we realize we are dying in each moment, life becomes that much more precious.

There is no separation between life and death. We are dying from the moment we are born. Life and death go hand in hand. If you could see that you and I are hand in hand then there is no separation. When I am taking care of you, I am taking care of myself. Simple.

Contemplative Care and its practices could transform care for elders and their concerns, fears, and ultimately their legacy and the meaning of life and of death. The contemplative care model includes providing compassionate care for the healthcare community, and creates an integrative and nurturing model of care that is self-reflective and transformative.

Andrea Sherman, Ph.D., is co-founder and co-author of Transitional Keys, a lifecycle transitions program that uses multi-disciplinary arts to ease, assist and enhance change and transitions. She is on the FORSA Editorial Board, and is a student in the Foundations of Buddhist Contemplative Care program.

Robert Chodo Campbell, HHC is a co-founder and co-executive director of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care. He serves on the Core Faculty for the Center’s Buddhist Chaplaincy Training Programs, and is a Senior Zen Buddhist Priest at Village Zendo in New York City.

For information about the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care, please e-mail info@zencare.org or visit www.zencare.org.

This article was originally published in Aging Today Online (ISSN 1949-2464) a quarterly publication by the American Society on Aging for its members and is reproduced here with permission of the publisher.

The ground (experience) of aging in Shambhala

2010-06-05T20:29:00.000-07:00

Contemplation on the question: What is the experience of aging in Shambhala?

What is written here arose from a 90 minute conversation among 12 Shambhala practitioners, all 60 years of age or older. I have summarized some of the points that were articulated and mixed them with my own experience at the age of 68.

--David Whitehorn (Mountain Drum)
5June2010, Halifax

Precious human birth.
There is a finite amount of time left in this life. The meaning of ‘precious human birth’ becomes more and more evident.

What to do with whatever time remains; a more and more frequent spontaneous contemplation. A long list of personal interests comes to mind, creative passions not yet explored, places to visit literally and in my mind. Perhaps the time could go into long periods of meditation or programs in contemplative disciplines of various kinds that I’ve always wanted to learn but never found the time.

On the other hand, perhaps the time and energy would be better used by engaging the world to help sort out the multitude of difficulties that face the world at what seems like a crucial period in the evolution of human culture. After all, the Shambhala vision is of enlightened society. If that vision has been central to my life so far, would it not make sense to engage it even more intensively in the final years? The Bodhisattva Warrior certainly takes care of her/himself, but does so in order to be able to help others.

Death.
There is no escaping death. What will that be like? The practice has always been about letting go, but what will it be like to let go of everything? In my practice, formal and informal, I notice how much I cling to my preconceptions, how often I freak out when the experience of groundlessness suddenly arises. At some level I understand that the ‘me’ who is going to die never really existed, but there is no denying my attachment to this form, empty as it may be. There are inspiring stories of many old people, some great practitioners, some just ordinary folks, who have relaxed into death. But is there a ‘good death’ to which I should aspire, or is it more about relating directly with how ever my death unfolds? If the concept of reincarnation is true, we’ve all experienced death many times and, the last time around, handled it well enough to achieve a precious human birth, but not well enough to avoid reincarnation altogether; or perhaps we chose to return to help others, a comforting thought.

Nursing homes.Death is one thing but what about an extended period of serious illness and disability, being unable to care for myself for months or years. I’ve been in nursing homes and I don’t like to idea of ending up in that kind of institutional environment. Can the Shambhala mandala organize itself to provide an alternative?

Isolation.Even if I don’t need to be in a nursing home, will I become less and less active and become isolated from people and the activities of the world? Will I be unable to attend programs to hear the teachings and be in the presence of great teachers and my dharma sisters and brothers?

A friend who lives alone recounts how, when she had an extended illness, it seemed that everyone forgot about her. Do I take my connections with others for granted? I think of myself as being independent, but there is no denying that I do better, in terms of body, speech and mind, if my life is interlinked with others in a meaningful and caring way in which I can both give and receive.

Happiness.I recognize that there is a difference between experiencing aloneness, the fact of being an individual sentient being, and experiencing loneliness, a confused clinging to the idea that happiness comes from external events (see the 1974 Seminary transcripts). I’m in awe of the 100 year old woman in Halifax, a friend of a friend, who lives in poverty in the most dangerous and degraded apartment building in the city, yet is always caring and giving toward others and radiates happiness.

Is it useful to contemplate and talk about aging?
Has this contemplation on the experience of getting older, the ground of aging, been useful? When a 76 year old friend was invited to participate in a group discussion about aging she laughed. “No thanks, I already did that. I’m too busy living”. Another friend, 94 year old, is angered and offended by the idea that people would relate to her as an old person.

If this kind of contemplation tends to solidify my view of myself as being ‘old’ then it would seem counter-productive. On the other hand, if it helps me to be more aware of what is unfolding in my life and how to work with that in a skillful way, then it would seem to be helpful.

Suggested change to statement on aging in Shambhala

2010-04-16T15:51:00.000-07:00

Gary Kellam has proposed the following changes.

Old version (November 2009):

(4) In Shambhala we can simultaneously recognize both the opportunity to be more openly engaged with the world as we grow older, and the inevitable decline in physical and mental capacities, culminating in death.

Proposed new version:

“(4) In Shambhala we can recognize both the opportunity to be more
openly engaged with the world as we grow older and, at the very same
time, the increasing likelihood of conditions that lessen mental
capacity and the inevitable decline in physical capacities that
culminates in death.”

Many thanks to Gary for this important suggestion.

Invitation to join a "Shambhala Network on Aging"

2010-04-10T11:19:00.000-07:00

An Invitation to Join a Shambhala Network on Aging.

Each year more Shambhalians experience the delights and challenges of what is conventionally termed ‘old age’. Some of us are ourselves celebrating birthdays in our 60s, 70s, 80s or 90s. Many of us have family members or friends who are.

A recent survey revealed that 20% of Shambhalians are already over the age of 60 and fully 50% are between 45 and 60.

Over the past two years, ten of us, convening as the Shambhala Working Group on Aging, have been contemplating the implications of this shift in the demographics of our community. Our thoughts to date are summarized in a “Statement on Aging in Shambhala” that was presented to the 2009 Shambhala Congress. (see below )

The central message of the statement is that being older offers both (1) a rich opportunity for practice and contribution to creating enlightened society and (2) challenges and needs for support arising from illness, disability or financial difficulties.

Considering how to address the opportunities and the challenges, the working group concluded that local initiatives are needed, tailored to the needs and conditions of each centre and community.

We are, therefore, inviting interested people to join a network of Shambhalians interested in working with aging related issues.

People who would like to join the network should be willing to (1) participate in a network phone conference once every other month, and (2) explore the opportunities and needs associated with aging in their own local center and community.

To join the network contact: davidwhitehorn@eastlink.ca

Please join by 15 May 2010.

For further information and background documents see:

http://onaginginshambhala.blogspot.com/ http://www.shambhala.org/community/aging/index.php

For those interested in aging, but unable to participate in the network, please join aging-talk@shambhala.org

Members of the Working Group on Aging: Ann Cason, Aaron Snyder, Marita McLaughlin, Donna Hanczaryk, Jacquie Bell, Victoria Howard, Louis Fitch, Chris Rempel, Susan Stewart, Acharya Emily Bower, David Whitehorn (Chair).

On Aging in Shambhala

The following statement is intended to provide the emerging Shambhala society with an initial set of principles upon which to contemplate and build an enlightened response to the inevitable process of aging. The statement has been developed by the Shambhala Working Group on Aging, a working group of the Sakyong’s Council and a core working group within the Community Care Council.

Statement on Aging in Shambhala:

(1) The inherent nature of mind, basic goodness, being unconditional, does not change with age. No matter how old or infirmed we may become, basic goodness remains fully intact.
(2) Rather than viewing aging as leading to the fixation of long standing habitual patterns, with mind training (meditation practice), as we grow older there is the opportunity for mind to become more open and less fixed.
(3) Physical and mental capacities inevitably change with increasing age.
(4) In Shambhala we can simultaneously recognize both the opportunity to be more openly engaged with the world as we grow older, and the inevitable decline in physical and mental capacities, culminating in death.
(5) In this context, ‘conventional’ retirement is a misguided myth. The idea that as we age we can ‘retire’ from the world and become less engaged is not consistent with Shambhala vision. Quite to the contrary, as our responsibilities and time commitment for family and livelihood decrease we can devote more time and energy to building enlightened society, as well as to our personal practices. This is ‘enlightened’ retirement.
(6) As we age many of us will, at some point, experience physical ailments that will make it difficult, or perhaps impossible, for us to care for ourselves. At those times, other members of Shambhala society need to be positioned to come forward to be sure that what we are unable to do for ourselves is done.

This invitation was also posted on the Shambhala Times website on April 9, 2010. The link to that post is:

http://shambhalatimes.org/2010/04/09/join-us-in-a-network-on-aging/

Further progress report on open discussions on aging held at the Halifax Shambhala Centre

2010-04-10T11:04:00.000-07:00

Three open discussion sessions on aging were held in March and April 2010 at the Halifax Shambhala Centre. A summary of the first session is provided in a previous post on this blog. Here is summary of the second and third sessions.

Summary of the second session:

On Tuesday, March 30, from 4-6pm, the second ‘Open discussion on aging in Shambhala’ was held with ten people engaged in a lively two hour discussion. The list of topics arising from the previous session (March 15) was noted. In this session the discussion delved more deeply into some of the previously identified issues.

Three topics seemed to stand out: (1) helping people prepare for ‘old age’ through awareness of benefits and available supports; (2) beginning to define the role of ‘seniors/elders’ in the Shambhala community, this being the first generation of practitioners to enter old age in large numbers; and (3) how to develop a more organized and visible community care process.

There was a general sense that ongoing discussion/work group(s) would be helpful.

Summary of the third session:

On April 6, 2010, the third open discussion on aging was held at the Halifax Shambhala Centre. Ten people participated, several of whom had not been at the previous two sessions.

Amidst the wide ranging discussion the overall theme that emerged had to do with developing mutual supports among older Shambhalians.

First, there was talk about creating on-line groups that would allow people to keep in closer communication with one another.

Second, there was an extended discussion about community housing; ways in which older Shambhlians could live closer together. The complexity of actually creating housing projects was acknowledged.

Finally, there was a strong interest expressed in forming an ongoing group to discuss and share the “experience of aging”. This group would not approach aging as a problem. Rather the intent would be to simply examine the ground, the actual experience of aging.

Open discussion on aging: Halifax initial progress report

2010-03-21T12:35:00.000-07:00

This is the second post in a series of the process of open discussion about aging in Shambhala within the Halifax Shambhala community.

PROGRESS REPORT: ON AGING IN SHAMBHALA; An open discussion.

Thirty people gathered at the Halifax Shambhala Centre on the evening of March 15, 2010 to share ideas, concerns and information about aging. After a talking circle in which each person expressed their views, we formed into working groups to begin defining key issues. The results from the working groups are listed below. It was also decided to schedule two additional gatherings.

THE NEXT GATHERINGS WILL BE: TUESDAY, MARCH 30, from 4-6pm (Not Monday the 29th as previously announced) and TUESDAY, APRIL 6, from 7-9pm; at the Shambhala Centre.

At these gatherings we will further explore, refine and prioritize issues and develop plans for how the key issues could be addressed. The gatherings are open to anyone interested. It is not necessary to have attended the previous meetings.

Anyone wishing to be on an email list related to aging in Shambhala can send an email to: davidwhitehorn@eastlink.ca

SUMMARY OF ISSUES RAISED AT THE GATHERING ON MARCH 15:
Advocate for accessibility to the Halifax Shambhala Center.
Service for people who need help, including creating a group housing situation.
Elders as wisdom and compassion holders.
A needs assessment of community members over 50 years of age.
Time limited ‘aging group’ for discussion of aging related issues.

Cultivate compassionate resources to help people in need.
Co-housing as we get older (Why don’t we have a Marpa House in Halifax?).
Economic crisis for people who put time into Shambhala instead of their own careers.
Practice and talk are fine, but it’s time to ‘do something’.

“Good at the beginning, good in the middle, good in the end”.
Support group among elders.
Housing options; group and shared.
How elders can offer their wisdom.

Support for care givers of elderly parents.
Using the Deleg system.
Help getting funding.
Social isolation and social networks.
Nutrition.
“Universal Design” for accessibility.
Passing wisdom to the next generation.

---21March2010…..dw

Open discussion of aging related issues: the process in Halifax

2010-03-21T12:14:00.000-07:00

One of the goals of the Shambhala Working Group on Aging is to support Shambhala Centers and groups in identifying and working with aging related issues. It is likely that, although there will be many commonalities, each center/group will have somewhat unique issues and resources to work with them.

It my be useful to share the process and content as different centers working on aging related issues. A series of postings on this blog will attempt to do so, beginning with a process that has begun in Halifax.

The first post includes the invitation tht was sent out to all members and friends of the Halifax Shambhala Centre. The next post will provide an initial progress report.

On Aging in Shambhala: an open discussion of ‘old age’ and its implications for individuals, families and community

Discussion facilitated by David Whitehorn, Chair of the Shambhala Working Group on Aging.

Monday, March 15, 7:30 – 9:00 pm at the Halifax Shambhala Centre

What does it mean to grow old in Shambhala? How do the Shambhala practices and the vision of enlightened society relate to the experience of what is conventionally termed ‘old age’? How can we, as individuals and as a community of practitioners, respond to the needs of older people in our lives?

These and related questions will form the basis for this open discussion. We will use an informal “talking circle” and related formats so that everyone can contribute to the discussion, to the extent they wish.

This gathering also marks the beginning of an ongoing network for people interested in addressing issues of ‘old age’ in the context of the Shambhala teachings.

There is no cost for this event. Everyone who is interested is warmly invited

Report to the Sakyong's Council

2010-02-23T17:24:00.000-08:00

This website provides a way to archive documents that have been developed by the Shambhala Working Group on Aging. These documents are part of an evolving discussion based on the question, "what does it mean to grow old in Shambhala?". The document below was presented to the Sakyong's Council on 11 February 2010 and represents a refinement of the "Statement on Aging" that was presented to the Shambhala Congress in November 2009.

It has been two years since a working group on aging was initiated. During that time the working group has been contemplating and exploring issues raised by the fact that a significant proportion of the citizens of Shambala society will be, over the next 10-20 years, entering into what is conventionally termed ‘old age’.

These two years could be considered as Phase 1, the goal of which has been to understand the nature of the issues and develop an initial approach to the issues of ‘aging in Shambhala’. Some of the key points are summarized here:

Aging is not a problem to be avoided or denied. Like any other phase of life, the older years are an opportunity to wake up. Nonetheless, there is a reality to the decline in physical and mental capacity that accompanies what is conventionally termed ‘old age’. It is helpful to acknowledge aging and mix the experience of being older with practice.

In terms of formal practice, contemplation on old age, sickness and death is a basic Buddhist practice. As well, ‘The Elixer of Life, a Birthday Practice’ written by Sakyong Mipham, works directly with aging, at all ages. Note that we have recently supplicated the Sakyong to write additional practices for students reaching the age of 60-65.

During most of what is conventionally called old age, people are basically able to take care of themselves. However, due to socioeconomic and/or health issues, many people are, at some point in their older years, in need of significant support. How that support is organized and carried out is a central question for us as a Shambhala society.

At this point the concept of “community support”, in which groups of people come together in an organized and intentional manner to support one another, appears to be a workable approach. The ad hoc support teams that frequently form around Shambhalians who are ill are one example. There are larger and more sustained examples in the general society.

Goals for Phase 2 (2010-2012).
Develop a network of people at major city and land centres to address issues of aging. The issues include (1) how to adapt the physical and organizational structure of the centres to relate with the capabilities and the needs of older Shambhalians so that they can continue to participate in programs and contribute to the life of the centres and (2) how to develop supports for older Shambhala who may need it.

The members of the working group are: Ann Cason, Aaron Snyder, Marita McLaughlin, Donna Hanczaryk, Jacquie Bell, Victoria Howard, Louis Fitch, Chris Rempel, Susan Stewart, Acharya Emily Bower, Jane Ward, David Whitehorn (Chair).

http://onaginginshambhala.blogspot.com/ http://www.shambhala.org/community/aging/index.php

Statement on Aging presented to the 2009 Shambhala Congress

2009-11-18T09:14:00.000-08:00

On Aging in Shambhala.

The following statement is intended to provide the emerging Shambhala society with an initial set of principles upon which to contemplate and build an enlightened response to the inevitable process of aging. The statement has been developed by the Shambhala Working Group on Aging, a working group of the Sakyong’s Council and a core working group within the Community Care Council.

Statement on Aging in Shambhala:
(1) The inherent nature of mind, basic goodness, being unconditional, does not change with age. No matter how old or infirmed we may become, basic goodness remains fully intact.
(2) Rather than viewing aging as leading to the fixation of long standing habitual patterns, with mind training (meditation practice), as we grow older there is the opportunity for mind to become more open and less fixed.
(3) Physical and mental capacities inevitably decline with increasing age.
(4) In Shambhala we can simultaneously recognize both the opportunity to be more openly engaged with the world as we grow older, and the inevitable decline in physical and mental capacities, culminating in death.
(5) In this context, ‘conventional’ retirement is a misguided myth. The idea that as we age we can ‘retire’ from the world and become less engaged is not consistent with Shambhala vision. Quite to the contrary, as our responsibilities and time commitment for family and livelihood decrease we can devote more time and energy to building enlightened society, as well as to our personal practices. This is ‘enlightened’ retirement.
(6) As we age many of us will, at some point, experience physical ailments that will make it difficult, or perhaps impossible, for us to care for ourselves. At those times, other members of Shambhala society need to be positioned to come forward to be sure that what we are unable to do for ourselves is done.

Recommendations:
(1) Each Shambhala centre form its own working group on aging. This might be accomplished by placing aging as one topic within the context of a ‘health and well being’ or ‘community care council’. These local working groups will be supported by the international working group.
(2) A Shambhala conference on aging be held in July 2010, at which, among other things, the local working groups can exchange experiences and innovations.

The Shambhala Working Group on Aging was formed in 2008. The members of the working group are: Ann Cason, Aaron Snyder, Marita McLaughlin, Donna Hanczaryk, Jacquie Bell, Victoria Howard, Louis Fitch, Chris Rempel, Susan Stewart, Acharya Emily Bower, David Whitehorn (Chair).

Narrative by Ann Cason

2009-09-10T11:50:00.000-07:00

I am very pleased to let you know that a new narrative by Ann Cason is now available on the 'aging page' of Shambhala.org. The narrative describes the last days of one of our most respected practitioners, Ruth Astor, and the care circle that formed around her.
The link to the narrative is:

http://www.shambhala.org/community/aging/index.php

Ann Cason, who was an important part of that circle is herself one our lineage treasures in the area of aging, having dedicated her life to working with the frail elderly in the vision of enlightened society. Ann's book, Circles of Care, is a classic and everyone interested in aging in the context of Shambhala should read it.
The Amazon link to Ann's book is:

http://www.amazon.com/Circles-Care-Quality-Elders-Comfort/dp/1570624712/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1252607655&sr=8-1

Preparing the Ground

2009-07-13T10:09:00.000-07:00

Contemplating the interesting articles in the New York Times about the nuns in upstate New York who are mindfully, with discernment, caring for one another as they die, I started to think about how they had prepared the ground for being able to work with death in that way.

What came to mind was that these women had chosen, long ago, to live and work together as a community and to make that community, and its work, the central focus in their life. In that way, over many years, they created a container, and relationships within it, that were in place when they needed to relate with serious illness and impending death.

For most people getting old stretches out over many years, several decades, while terminal illness is often relatively shorter. As, over the past year, the Shambhala Working Group on Aging has been exploring the issues of aging in the context of enlightened society, it has been evident that we need to pay attention to the early stages of being old, when people are still able to care for themselves, and establish formal and informal networks and containers that will be in place when the need for more intensive care arises.

In Shambhala we are, except for a small number of monastics, a community of lay practitioners. We do not live in a convent. Our lives are quite complex, we live relatively independently and have all kinds of relationships and responsibilities. In that kind of situation, when severe illness or impending death arise, we rely on ad hoc circles of care, put together on the spot. Sometimes these circles are wonderful, other times not so much. Sometimes it’s not possible to form a meaningful circle at all.

The point for me is that how we organize ourselves as we get old, before we need care, will set the ground for what can happen when we do.

Convent provides model for working with dying

2009-07-10T16:05:00.000-07:00

Mary Lang found this very interesting article from the NYTimes .

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/09/health/09sisters.html?_r=1&emc=eta1

Mary's comment is that; "It seems like a model of what Shambhalian Aging could look like, particularly end of life. The quote about bringing "discernment" to the process seems particularly apt".

The article is the second in a series; see the link below for the overview.

http://newoldage.blogs.nytimes.com/

Guaranteed to cheer you up

2009-07-04T06:43:00.000-07:00

Jacquie Bell sent this wonderful video link.

An old couple walked into the lobby of the Mayo Clinic and spotted a piano. They've been married for 62 years and he'll be 90 this year.

http://www.fark.com/cgi/vidplayer.pl?IDLink=4365716

We have been discovered

2009-07-04T06:34:00.000-07:00

Many thanks to our friends at the Shambhala Sun who, on their own, discovered this blog and put an announcement about it on their new "Maha Sangha News" website. The link is:

http://www.shambhalasun.com/news/?p=3376#more-3376

It may be a good time to remind readers of this blog that it is part of a larger effort by the Shambhala Working Group on Aging to cultivate discussion and action around the question of what it means to grow old in an enlightened society.

For more information on the working group see:

http://www.shambhala.org/community/aging/index.php

Reunion

2009-07-04T06:31:00.000-07:00

Last week I had dinner with two friends I had last seen fifty years ago. We were teenagers at a summer camp back then, now they are a married couple in their mid 60’s. They had found me through mutual friends. We spent three hours over dinner at the Inn where they were staying in Halifax, on a vacation tour of the Canadian Maritime provinces. Of course they were older, but they looked, talked and acted much the same. They said the same about me.

The story of their life came out in bits and pieces; getting married, having children, various moves and changes of occupation, grandchildren, retirement to a quiet island in Maine, keeping in touch with life long friends. My story was different in detail, but not that much different overall.

By the end of the meal the stories seemed to have been told and for a few minutes we chatted about the state of the world, the weather, the local tourist sites; just an ordinary conversation, as if we were friends who had seen each other the previous day; not half a century ago.

Since that evening I’ve been contemplating the meaning of this experience, this reunion. What does it mean that fifty years of life, theirs and mine, can be encapsulated in a few hours, over a meal?

Last night PBS ran a documentary about Garrison Keillor, who is 67 (as am I). At the end of the film he commented that, when we are young we hope for an extraordinary life, but as we get older we realize that everyone’s life is fundamentally the same; “we all get an ordinary life”.

--dave whitehorn

Doctor Shigeaki Hinohara

2009-06-08T14:05:00.000-07:00

I received the following email today and wanted to share it. It was sent by two elders in the Shambhala community.

At the age of 97 years and 4 months, Shigeaki Hinohara is one of the world's longest-serving physicians and educators. Hinohara's magic touch is legendary: Since 1941 he has been healing patients at St. Luke's International Hospital in Tokyo and teaching at St. Luke's College of Nursing. After World War II, he envisioned a world-class hospital and college springing from the ruins of Tokyo; thanks to his pioneering spirit and business savvy, the doctor turned these institutions into the nation's top medical facility and nursing school. Today he serves as chairman of the board of trustees at both organizations. Always willing to try new things, he has published around 150 books since his 75th birthday, including one "Living Long, Living Good" that has sold more than 1.2 million copies. As the founder of the New Elderly Movement, Hinohara encourages others to live a long and happy life, a quest in which no role model is better than the doctor himself.

"Energy comes from feeling good, not from eating well or sleeping a lot. We all remember how as children, when we were having fun, we often forgot to eat or sleep. I believe that we can keep that attitude as adults, too. It's best not to tire the body with too many rules such as lunchtime and bedtime.All people who live long regardless of nationality, race or gender share one thing in common: None are overweight... For breakfast I drink coffee, a glass of milk and some orange juice with a tablespoon of olive oil in it. Olive oil is great for the arteries and keeps my skin healthy. Lunch is milk and a few cookies, or nothing when I am too busy to eat. I never get hungry because I focus on my work.. Dinner is veggies, a bit of fish and rice, and, twice a week, 100 grams of lean meat..Always plan ahead. My schedule book is already full until 2014, with lectures and my usual hospital work. In 2016 I'll have some fun, though: I plan to attend the Tokyo Olympics!

There is no need to ever retire, but if one must, it should be a lot later than 65. The current retirement age was set at 65 half a century ago, when the average life-expectancy in Japan was 68 years and only 125 Japanese were over 100 years old. Today, Japanese women live to be around 86 and men 80, and we have 36,000 centenarians in our country. In 20 years we will have about 50,000 people over the age of 100...Share what you know. I give 150 lectures a year, some for 100 elementary-school children, others for 4,500 business people. I usually speak for 60 to 90 minutes, standing, to stay strong.When a doctor recommends you take a test or have some surgery, ask whether the doctor would suggest that his or her spouse or children go through such a procedure. Contrary to popular belief, doctors can't cure everyone. So why cause unnecessary pain with surgery I think music and animal therapy can help more than most doctors imagine.To stay healthy, always take the stairs and carry your own stuff. I take two stairs at a time, to get my muscles moving.My inspiration is Robert Browning's poem "Abt Vogler." My father used to read it to me. It encourages us to make big art, not small scribbles. It says to try to draw a circle so huge that there is no way we can finish it while we are alive. All we see is an arch; the rest is beyond our vision but it is there in the distance.

Pain is mysterious, and having fun is the best way to forget it. If a child has a toothache, and you start playing a game together, he or she immediately forgets the pain. Hospitals must cater to the basic need of patients: We all want to have fun. At St. Luke's we have music and animal therapies, and art classes.Don't be crazy about amassing material things. Remember: You don't know when your number is up, and you can't take it with you to the next place.Hospitals must be designed and prepared for major disasters, and they must accept every patient who appears at their doors. We designed St.... Luke's so we can operate anywhere: in the basement, in the corridors, in the chapel. Most people thought I was crazy to prepare for a catastrophe, but on March 20, 1995, I was unfortunately proven right when members of the Aum Shinrikyu religious cult launched a terrorist attack in the Tokyo subway. We accepted 740 victims and in two hours figured out that it was sarin gas that had hit them. Sadly we lost one person, but we saved 739 lives.

Science alone can't cure or help people. Science lumps us all together, but illness is individual. Each person is unique, and diseases are connected to their hearts. To know the illness and help people, we need liberal and visual arts, not just medical ones...Life is filled with incidents. On March 31, 1970, when I was 59 years old, I boarded the Yodogo, a flight from Tokyo toFukuoka. It was a beautiful sunny morning, and as Mount Fuji came into sight, the plane was hijacked by the Japanese Communist League-Red Army Faction. I spent the next four days handcuffed to my seat in 40-degree heat. As a doctor, I looked at it all as an experiment and was amazed at how the body slowed down in a crisis.Find a role model and aim to achieve even more than they could ever do. My father went to the United States in 1900 to study at DukeUniversity in North Carolina. He was a pioneer and one of my heroes. Later I found a few more life guides, and when I am stuck, I ask myself how they would deal with the problem.It's wonderful to live long. Until one is 60 years old, it is easy to work for one's family and to achieve one's goals. But in our later years, we should strive to contribute to society. Since the age of 65, I have worked as a volunteer. I still put in 18 hours seven days a week and love every minute of it."

BEING OLD IN THE TWENTY FIRST CENTURY by Ann Cason

2009-05-25T09:29:00.000-07:00

One day, as I was interviewing a young woman who wanted a job working with older adults, she told me, “When the consumer needs toileting, I---“
Oh, oh, I wondered. Is she going to tell me about bed pans or the correct terminology for bodily processes? But that wasn’t it. Caregivers are often taught to label elders by their function or by their disease.(i.e. there’s a broken hip in bed two) We are also taught not to use slang for bodily processes. We can’t say, “The old woman needs to pee.” The elder is no longer perceived as an old person vegetating in a rocking chair. Older people are no longer referred to as old, frail, or dying. They are older adults at the end of life who may have life limiting illness and who are consumers of services.
Some think that the elderly consume too many health services. Some think that too many elderly people slip through the cracks and are not served enough. Either way whether you think of an elder as a consumer, a vegetater, or a rocker; the view seems to be dead end attitude. It is the trash heap, where people land, who are thought of by their function in society. Am I a consumer, a boomer, or a bed in a facility? Am I staying home or aging in place? Do I contribute services or use them up? But there is another question to ask. What is it to be a human being—to live and die with appreciation, with tenderness, with inquisitiveness, and the courage it takes to communicate without all those labels?
Continuing with the interview, I tell the young woman being interviewed this: The other day I called on a very old woman to see if she needed some help. “Bring me a car.” She told me. “I want to go to Talbot’s to buy my last sweater.
“How would you respond to this elder?” I ask the young woman.
She replied. “Well, I wonder if someone so old needs a new sweater.”
“But what if she wants one?” I ask. “Like a last wish before dying? Or what if she is being a drama queen or trying to solicit pity?”
“Should she want a new sweater when she is nearly 90 years old?” The young woman persists. “Would she get her money’s worth?”
“Can’t we start where she is?” I suggest. “Wouldn’t it be healing to take an expedition to a store: the fresh air, talking with sales clerks, the touch of wool and fake fur? What about the color that wakes you up and lets you enjoy being alive?”
“Well, maybe we could call the doctor for some Ativan. (anti-anxiety drug) A shopping neurosis is not so good.” The prospective caregiver suggested..
I relax into the interview. Maybe this young woman and I don’t quite connect. Young and old have different words. Yet, how good it is to talk it over. “There is more than one way to skin a cat,” as my own mother often told me. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if communication could be the courage we live with, so we wouldn’t have to label our dear fellow compadres as consumers, even if we still want sweaters or need help with toileting when we are old?

Audacious Aging

2009-05-22T17:53:00.000-07:00

It is no surprise that many people, not involved in Shambhala, are noticing that they (and a lot of their friends) are getting older. Nor is it a surprise that many of these people are bringing their life experience and expertise to bear on the question of how they plan to spend their ‘elder’ years.

The newly published book, “Audacious Aging”, edit by Stephanie Marohn (Elite Books, 2008/2009) is made up of short essays, a few pages in length, by nearly forty interesting and thoughtful people, ranging in age from 40’s to 90’s.

Their careers and life paths are quite diverse, ranging from spiritual leaders (Deepak Chopra, Ram Dass ) to politicians (Robert Byrd, George McGovern), to performers (Lena Horne, Dick Van Dyke), to culture changers like Helen Gurley Brown and Gloria Steinem. The topics range from medicine, to culture, to just plain common sense, and more.

What is common in nearly all the essays is the message that audacious aging is a continuation of audacious living, of being willing to engage in the world and go beyond the routine, to deepen and contribute.

In short, getting old is a great opportunity to bring life to fruition on a personal, interpersonal and societal level. One writer joked that ‘we thought the revolution was in the 60’s, but it may turn out to be in our 60’s’.

In the forward by Joe Laur and Isabelle St-Jean, the intent of the book is stated as follows:

“We invite you to ride with us on the wings of courage, from the heightened perspective afforded by years of journeying. May we all rise to the challenge of transforming our society from a youth / appearance-worshiping culture into one that fosters the values of the heart, supports the evolution of consciousness, and leaves to future generations a legacy of which we can be wildly proud”.

This statement could be seen as pointing to the core aspiration of Shambhalians as well, to transform the world from the materialism (physical, psychological and spiritual) of the setting sun outlook to the vision of enlightened society.

In any case this book provides an introduction to a wealth of useful tools, information and inspiration.

Feeling my age

2009-04-29T11:39:00.000-07:00

I am 67 years old and today I’m feeling my age. A cold, or flu virus, has been chewing on my cells for the past four days. Nothing serious, just a bit of sinus congestion and a feeling of being spaced out. But it is certainly enough to throw “me” off its busy game plan.

At the same time the news channels are filled with dire predictions of a swine flu pandemic. It seems that tiny strands of nucleic acids could take over my body at any moment. The overall sense I have is of being physically and mentally vulnerable

There is no doubt that I’m getting older. I can feel it in many parts of my life.

Three years ago I retired from my job as a Clinical Nurse Specialists in Psychiatry. The pension cheques began showing up, a monthly reminder that my full time working days were behind me (unless the pension plan goes broke). The contract work I’ve been doing since then, consulting on psychiatry research and education initiatives, has kept my mind involved in the developments in psychiatry, and brought in some much needed extra money. Still, as I talk with younger people who have taken on the positions of responsibility I used to hold, my passage into another phase of life is vividly evident.

I seem to be exercising more consistently than I did when I was working full time. Nonetheless my endurance and strength are certainly diminished from what they were ten years ago. One marker I have for that decline is Magyal Pomra Encampment (MPE). I have attended each of the MPEs over the past ten years. Last year I particularly noticed that I needed to rest more and couldn’t fully participate in drill practice. Fortunately, during MPE2008 a group of us who were senior officers, and somewhat older, were grouped together, partially in recognition of our physical status (although some of my MPE peers have not slowed down nearly as much as I have).

Similarly, health and comfort issues have begun to shape the way my wife and I attend major programs at Dorje Denma Ling (DDL), the land center closest to our home in Halifax. At DDL there are only a limited number of rooms in the lodge that was built several years ago. The rest of the accommodations are in small cabins or in tents. These are quite adequate, but can be difficult in poor weather. Like many friends our age, we try to make reservations at nearby B&B’s, but these too are limited in number.

Death is also becoming more familiar and real. The big lesson for me was the death of my parents. They were both very competent and healthy people. When my dad died at age 81, only two months after being diagnosed with liver cancer, it just seemed unbelievable to me. Fortunately I was able to see, and actually touch, his body a few hours after his death. (I was on an airplane coming to see him when he died). That certainly helped make it real for me. But I still am contemplating the fact that these two people, who seemed so much better at dealing with life than I have ever been, were not immune to death.

As the reality of aging becomes clearer, the sense of needing to develop a deeper understanding and realization of basic goodness also seems more evident; but how to do that? Is it time to become a monastic or live at a land center? Should I be doing different practices because I am older? These are the questions, I’m still looking for answers.

-dave whitehorn

Beyond Hope and Fear

2009-04-22T04:48:00.000-07:00

The following quote from Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche may be helpful as a contemplation.

“Tibetans are cheerful about getting older, because they are proud to have lived another year. People in the west seem to take a different attitude. We sometimes have a hard time accepting change, especially when it involves aging, sickness and death. We feel depressed about getting older, because we are getting further from being young. I certainly don’t mind getting older. I’ve enjoyed the process of growing and learning. I owe my appreciation in part to my teachers, who taught me to contemplate the truths of human existence. They would often laugh as they talked about all the different ways we could die. They said, “Ultimately, death comes without warning”. They were not being callous or vindictive. They knew the power that comes from contemplating reality. It frees our mind from hope and fear. Now I know that I can either fight impermanence tooth and nail or accept it and grow from there.”

---Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche. In Ruling Your World, Morgan Road Books, 2005; pp 121-122.

The construct of ‘old age’

2009-04-21T13:29:00.000-07:00

Recently a group of us were working on a proposal about aging that focused on the transition into ‘old age’. We consulted with a long time Shambhala Buddhist practitioner who is 94 years of age about what age might mark the entry into ‘old age’. Her reply was, “well…90….maybe”.

Contemplating these comments I was reminded of the Buddhists teachings about how we create dualistic constructs (a fundamental one being the sense of ‘me’) and then forget that we made them up. We go around believing that our constructs have an essence of their own; that they actually exist.

When we use the words ‘old age’ we are using a dualistic construct. It may or may not be useful or helpful but from a non-dualistic point of view there really is no such thing as ‘old age’.

On a conventional dualistic level, it would also seem that the meaning we attach to a construct like ‘old age’ is not the same for everyone and, as well, can change over time.

My own case could be example. I am 67 years old. My grandfather died when he was 67. At that time I was a college student and my grandfather, who was dying of colon cancer, certainly seemed old to me. I would have placed him the category of ‘old age’.

On the other hand, my father was quite active and healthy when he was 67 and remained so until a brief terminal illness at age 81. I know from several conversations when he was in his late 60’s that he did not consider himself old.

I don’t consider myself old either, although I love taking the Senior's discount. But I do recognize that I’m older than I was and that my body and brain/mind (especially my memory) are showing signs of being old.

The point of this contemplation, if there is one, could be that there is no single definition or meaning associated with the construct ‘old age’. It might, in fact, be helpful if we dropped that construct altogether. Perhaps instead of talking about 'old age' it would be more useful to simply talk about the experience of ‘being older’.

Tai Chi in the Park

2009-04-01T17:46:00.000-07:00

Ann Cason received this e-mail in response to a request for stories about enlightened aging:

Hi Ann,

This isn't a story, but is a very wonderful thing now happening in St. Johnsbury and Lyndonville. Susan Shaw and Vicki Giella were inspired to ask Richard Reoch if he would authorize me to lead a program for Seniors - I mostly call them "Elders" our of respect for their wisdom of years.

We started in St. J with around 20 people and it has grown. This coming summer will be our third summer in the park. We use St. J House in the winter. Sal DeMaio and Joanne Post have joined as leaders and together they support the Lyndonville group. We get some funding from through the Area Agency on Aging and Blue Cross. Of late i have been asked to start another group in Greensboro. It is a wonderful program. Enjoy our little film made by Richard Reoch.

http://www.dogooder.tv/Orgs/nevaaa/default.aspx?MovieID=1700

Much love, Patricia

Contemplation at 57

2009-03-25T16:51:00.000-07:00

I’m 57 years old now, just a few years shy of my mother’s age when she died at 62. My father, 17 years older than my mother, died when he was 86. As a child, I spent a lot of time around multiple generations of ‘old’ people; a great-aunt, a grandfather, cousins, and my oldest brother, who is 12 years older than I. Since I started 'growing up' all over again in the Shambhala community 33 years ago, people have appeared different to me than when I was a child. I enjoy the friendship of those who are at least 10 years older and some that are 30 years younger than me, with others in between. How did this happen? I see some of my contemporaries, friends and relatives associating mostly with people of their own age. Are they practicing ageism? I don’t know.

I do know that when my mind is drawn toward settling on an idea of how I’m supposed to look, dress, move, feel, behave, or think at this stage of life, I become trapped by hope or fear. Hope that I’ll have enough money to live with some degree of material comfort and fear that I’ll end up in a terrible nursing home. Hope that I’ll remember how to meditate and fear of being alone. Hope that I’m appropriate to continue teaching and fear that I’m out-dated.

I’m not in the greatest of physical shape, yet I still love to dance. I’m not on Facebook, yet I email every day. Sometimes I behave sillier than I ever saw my parents and sometimes I have a conservative attitude similar to theirs. I stopped coloring my hair a few years ago, yet enjoy 'decorating space' (per the Vidyadhara) with a touch of makeup. I used to think by this age I would know more. Instead, I find myself frequently saying, “I don’t get it”.

Little of how aging is occurring for me fits the model or example of my familial predecessors. My primary reference point for going forward is being sandwiched between my teachers and the teachings. I’m grateful for sometimes visualizing myself as a “16 year old in the full bloom of youth” and at other times “with shiny black moustache and eyebrows, wearing golden armor”. I’m grateful for the Elixir of Life sadhana that reminds me of what’s truly important.

I don’t know when the right time will be to call me “old”, a “senior citizen” or an “elder”. According to department stores, hotels and AARP, I’m already there. I do know that this precious human lifetime is so full of opportunities for wakefulness and temporary amnesia that I continually need to come back to the unconditional life force that sustains me; that life force in which we “possess wisdom without words and freedom from doubt”. We can call that basic goodness.

In the meantime, you can call me anything you like.

--Marita McLaughlin
25March2009

Families, aging and Shambhala

2009-03-23T08:52:00.000-07:00

When my mother died at age 86, her only grandchild–my daughter, then 14–asked if she could have my mother’s well-worn, simple gold wedding band. Since then, my daughter–now 21–has worn that ring nearly every day. With my mother’s death, my daughter no longer had living grandparents. Wearing the ring is her way of maintaining her sense of connection to her grandparents, her history, her family.

As Susan Williams has pointed out in her introduction to the Spring Equinox theme for the Shambhala Times, families are made up of multiple generations: children, parents and grandparents, not to mention aunts, uncles, cousins and, in Shambhala, all those wonderful people we call “sangha” who may not be blood relations (in this lifetime), but somehow are so closely connected to us in the grand scheme of things that they seem like family. For some of us, the members of the Mukpo Clan may in practice be our closest relatives.

Old age is as much a part of family life as is childhood or adolescence. Years ago it was common for grandparents to be living with their children and grandchildren. Today, the oldest members of a family are frequently separate from the rest physically, and often emotionally.

Many sangha families are currently involved in the long-distance process of trying to help elderly parents who live far away. See Meg Federico’s book, Welcome to the Departure Lounge, for one sangha member’s very difficult experience.

The demographics of Shambhala society, like that of North America in general, have a large bulge in the 45-60 age bracket. Currently, 50% of Shambhalians are in that age range, with 20% being over age 60.

Clearly, in the next 10-20 years, there will be a lot of old people in Shambhala society. They will be our relatives: parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and members of the Mukpo clan. They will be us.

How will we, in Shambhala society, work with the multi-generational issue? To what extent will we maintain the connection between the young and the old? How will we relate to the needs of the older generation (whether or not they have children) as they become more in need of support?

These are questions for all of us to contemplate. They are also the focus for the Shambhala Working Group on Aging, a working group of the Sakyong’s Council. (Click here to visit the group webpage.)

One important step in beginning to work with the “koan” of aging in Shambhala may be to keep the larger view of families in mind.

Note: This article originally appeared on the Shambhala Times website. The link to the article is: http://shambhalatimes.org/2009/03/15/aging-families-and-shambhala/

-posted by David Whitehorn (Mountain Drum)

What this blog is about

2009-03-22T15:25:00.000-07:00

What does it mean to grow old in an enlightened society? This is the fundamental contemplation that this blog will attempt to address.

Shambhala is the name of an ancient enlightened society that was said to have existed somewhere in the Himalayas. The Tibetan Buddhist teacher and master warrior, Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, brought the concept of Shambhala, of an enlightened society, to western civilization over thirty years ago. (Link to Shambhala: Sacred Path of the Warrior).

Trungpa Rinpoche emphasized that enlightened society was not a utopian fantasy or a long lost myth, but a way of working with the world on a moment- to-moment basis.

His son and heir, Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, in his recent book, Ruling Your World, (link to book) describes how Shambhala (enlightened society), can appear in our day-to-day lives:

“Just as in the context of Buddhism we are all already Buddha –“awake’- the world is already Shambhala. It is only because we are roaming in the kingdom of doubt and anger, jealousy and pride, that we cannot see it right now. When we see through our perpetual agitation and relax into basic goodness, the enlightened world of Shambhala begins to appear. Enlightenment is things as they are before we color them with our projections” – Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, Ruling Your World, pp190-191

In offering this blog we recognize that some readers will be students of Shambhala who have adopted the vision of enlightened society as the basis for their life and have pursued meditation and contemplative practices to enhance the likelihood that they will, in any moment, ‘relax into basic goodness’. Other readers may be engaged in other disciplines that are intended to uncover the inherent wakefulness of the human mind. Some readers may be less interested in individual ‘enlightenment’ and more interested in how social systems can be organized so as to bring out the best in human behaviour and experience.

We welcome all readers to contemplate the simple question: what does it mean to grow old in an enlightened society?